Dear T,

Tonight, the moon is full over the East Rand, casting silvery beams onto the undisturbed waters of the river that runs near the rehab center. I’ve found solace here in Benoni, a place where the rustling leaves speak in hushed tones of healing and the gentle river mirrors the revelations unearthed in therapy.

My sessions have become a sacred time, a Pandora’s Box that, once opened, reveals not only the chaos of my past decisions but the promise of wisdom and understanding. The therapists here, with their compassionate ear, encourage me to delve into a narrative I’ve long suppressed, to confront the dissonant chords of my life’s symphony.

This week, we accessed chapters of my soul that I had sealed away. In the secure confines of the counselor’s office, I learned of trauma’s indelible mark upon the canvas of my psyche. Like an archeologist, the therapist guided me through the ruins of childhood memories in Kempton Park, buried deep yet echoing through my present choices. We spoke of my father’s stern demeanor, the cold absence of praise, and the comfort I later found in alcoholic warmth—a false sense of kinship in every glass.

We also traced the footprints of our journey, yours and mine, through the streets of Johannesburg. How the enchantment of our love was powerful enough to stave off the demons for a time. Yet, addiction is a cunning adversary. In therapy, I came to see how the stresses of life—bills, endless shifts at work, the haunting silence after miscarriages—tightened the noose. Drinking was not merely a habit; it was an escape hatch, a pathway to a numbness that seemed like mercy in the moment.

In yesterday’s session, a particularly stark revelation unfolded before me: my accountability. I learned that alcoholism is an illness, yes, but my choices, my refusal to seek help earlier, were mine to own. For so long, I sailed in denial, washing up on the shores of Boksburg’s taverns, distancing myself further from you with each voyage.

Yet, amidst these confessions to ink and paper, I feel a transformation. The reflection in the river tonight is different; it shows a man emerging from his chrysalis, weary of cocooning in false narratives and self-pity. The support of those around me at the center—fellow travelers on this road to recovery—bolsters my spirit. They, too, have letters, unsent messages to loved ones, or fractured parts of themselves, all yearning for healing. Tomorrow, as I continue this therapeutic odyssey, I promise, my dear T, to face whatever truths arise with courage. I’ll embrace the vulnerability, the raw edges of a man rebuilding from the base, stone by stone. Each revelation in therapy is like a whispered secret from you, guiding me home—not to a place, but to an essence, to a life of purpose and clarity, sober and aware.

I miss you, my T, but I am thankful for this waystation on my journey, where the stars seem to align to show me the path forward. I remain dedicated to this process, trusting that in confronting my deepest fears and sorrows, I will find strength and redemption. Under the wide, hopeful sky of the East Rand, Tony

In the serene setting of Benoni, close to the childhood memories of Boksburg parks, lies our reputable rehab center dedicated to healing families torn by addiction. We provide comprehensive therapy that addresses deep-rooted issues beyond detoxification, aiming to mend relationships strained by alcoholism. If you’re yearning for reconciliation and lasting change, contact us at [email protected], or call +27798378484 / +27828863996. Let us guide you and your loved ones towards healing and understanding under the vast Gauteng skies.